what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
