Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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