That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
