How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
