He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
