I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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