i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
