Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
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