thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I want to fling myself into the sun
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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