just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
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