well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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