his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
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