god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize