found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
