My Higher Power is John Stamos
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
