SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
