When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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