I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
