Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize