That's when you crack a 10am beer
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He felt like a one man threesome
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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