Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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