FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
