Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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