Christians are straight up FREAKS
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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