Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
it was like his penis was on wheels.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
