my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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