The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
and she was petting her beer can
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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