David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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