How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
