Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Randomize