nut hugger
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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