So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
im calling her cock vulture from now on
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
