You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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