how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I think a kid would responsible me up
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
