I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
