dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize