I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
