Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
