This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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