Porn is love you can see.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
she smelled like a LAN party
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
My breasts were aching with rage.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
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