Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
