"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize