Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
No stitches, just platelets and will power
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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