and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
