Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize