Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
