He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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