8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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