im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
