I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize