he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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